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Big fan of The Weeknd here. Love his music. Love his ability to transform into different personas with each album, albeit different versions of himself. Love how he takes inspiration from movies and builds those cinematics into a lot of his music videos - in fact, back when I used to make video essays on YouTube, one of my biggest scrapped ideas was to dive into all the film references in his music videos. Like 'Blinding Lights' basically being a stright up Scorsese Casino homage with sprinkles of Todd Phillips' Joker, or the video for 'Out of Time' throwing it back to Sofia Coppola's Lost In Translation. I’ve even gone to see The Weeknd live on many occasions - the last of which genuinely might be one of the greatest experiences I’ve ever had at a concert. You get the point. Big fan here.

So trust me when I say, this film has to be one of the most pretentious, self indulgent piles of ass I have ever seen.

Metaphorical, surrealist and abstract? Sure, I can do that - but Abel bro, this is just not it. The commentary here (if you can even call it that), is nothing but basic, bottom-of-the-barrel baloney tackled with absolutely zero nuance, purpose or subtlety.

Part of me still feels trapped in that cinema still watching what’s essentially an hour and forty-five minutes of a painful excuse for companion piece to an album that’s not my favourite from Abel, but one that I still actually enjoy. The only thing this film really has going for it is it's visuals - and even then, every shot drags on like it's trying to win a staring contest with you.

Hurry Up Tomorrow? More like hurry up get me the fuck out of the cinema.

Here’s a montage of movie characters dancing to The Weeknd, that I made back in the day, that’s better than this film - youtu.be/X5NWc1m2tnU?si=RbHOByls-oQ7C-Nr

I am exhausted. 

I hate to say it, but the first third, maybe even half, of this film just wasn’t it guys. The Mission series has always had plots within plots, schemes within schemes, most of which work in really thickening the narrative, but here it feels less like clever storytelling and more like an endless loop of characters talking in circles. Bloated, convoluted and enough exposition to make The Entity itself go insane. Honestly if you ever want to overload a world-ending AI program, just make it sit through the first hour of this film.

And then? Ethan Hunt finds himself in the North Pacific Ocean - and suddenly, like that one Hangover meme goes, “We are baaaaack!” The second half of this film, although still overly bulky and not without its plotty plots and schemey schemes, is an epic, thunderous, terrifying, palms-sweating spectacle showcasing Mr. Tom Cruise conquering the elements, from land, to sea, to air. Whether it’d be aquatics or airplanes, the man has transcended just ‘stunts’ and is basically a fully-fledged superhero, and the result is nothing short of jaw-dropping. 

As the supposed farewell to the franchise, I’m not quite sure it delivers the emotional final note I’d hoped for - but even with the mixed feelings, I’m overwhelmed with gratitude for everything Ethan Hunt and co. have given us over the years. If this is really the end – Tom, thank you.

Watched on Tuesday May 13, 2025.

If you said this one was your favourite in the series, I wouldn’t even be mad. Gorgeously shot, sharply paced, and introduces some of the franchise’s strongest characters with the likes of Ilsa Faust and Solomon Lane. The stunts are as breathtaking as ever, but here they feel more organically woven into the narrative than in perhaps any other instalment.

Honestly, I haven’t enjoyed Rogue Nation this much since seeing it on release a decade ago. It often flies under the radar, overshadowed by the towering feats of Ghost Protocol and the cinematic juggernaut that is Fallout, but make no mistake - this is the franchise’s dark horse, and it absolutely holds its own.

I'll be honest, I just assumed this was gonna be complete trash. As a big horror fan, I’d somehow never seen a single Final Destination film. Call it the franchise that got away, but Warner Bros. kindly invited me to the multimedia screening of this latest instalment and, to my surprise? I actually had a blast!

Is it a ‘great film’? Not exactly. But without sounding like a total psychopath, watching people meet wildly over-the-top and brutal ends (in IMAX, no less), turned out to be a far more entertaining random Thursday night than I could have anticipated. I winced, I laughed… I also felt sorry for all the people in the audience who had piercings.

Ghost Protocol has always been my favourite. While it may not match the strength of Hoffman’s villain in MI3, the intrigue of Rogue Nation, or the sublime aesthetic of Fallout, it’s perhaps the most pivotal in the entire franchise. It marks a true turning point, propelling the series to new heights (quite literally) and injecting it with the second life that most modern-day franchises could only dream of. 

Also, Tom Cruise climbing, falling and climbing, leaping and falling off the Burj Khalifa… need I say more?

The opening of this film, just before the title credits, gets me - every, single, time. Despite knowing how things pan out later, that scene has to has to be one of the most intense in the whole damn franchise - and it's not even a death defying stunt! Cruise. Hoffman. One terrified. One terrifying. Just two of the very best doing their thing and it's straight up bone-chilling to watch.

There are some moments in film that seem both entirely plausible and utterly impossible, at the same time. The moments where the people involved are operating at a superhuman level to pull off, rely on extraordinary luck, or a bit of both.

You don’t have to be musical to recognize that Andrew Neiman’s final drum solo in Whiplash is one of those once-in-a-lifetime moments - equal parts raw talent, obsession, and sheer will. Ladies and gentlemen, some things you just have to see to believe and this weekend, I had the surreal experience of witnessing that very solo performed live, backed by a full jazz orchestra, and conducted in real time by none other than Justin Hurwitz himself. Absolutely breathtaking stuff.

Also, Justin Hurwitz’s reaction to when, in the film, Terence Fletcher says to Andrew ‘Any fucking moron can wave his arms and keep people in tempo’ – was priceless haha.

Okay, now we’re talking! 

Sort of like Marvel’s version of The Suicide Squad, Thunderbolts* is the misbehaved child of the franchise, who gets sent to the naughty step more often than one can count. It’s good. Frustratingly close to being great, in fact. While not without its flaws, it’s undeniably a bold step back in the right direction for the MCU.

Finally, an MCU movie that actually looks like a real damn movie! Although the colour palette is rather muted and uses darker tones to reflect the jaded nature of the characters, thankfully Thunderbolts* avoids the grey, flat, washed-out, heavy green-screen aesthetic that’s plagued so many recent MCU films.  

Florence Pugh stuns as always, leading the film with an eye-rolling swagger but also emotional depth and a tonne of heart. The film refuses to rely on the usual, heavy CGI-laden spectacle we’ve come to expect from this franchise and instead, have its conflict rooted in something much more raw and personal - and that’s a big thumbs up from me! It’s a refreshingly mature stance for the MCU to take and even if it’s tackling of the subject of mental health isn’t anything groundbreaking, for some people, all it takes is to see a band of broken Marvel misfits find connection and community, reminding us all that even the most damaged of people can build something meaningful together.

Easily the weakest in the franchise because plain and simple, it tries to be a Bond film. Everything from Dougray Scott’s overly camp, maniacal villain (also if you’re going to do that, don’t simply name the guy ‘Sean’), to Thandiwe Newton’s tragic Bond girl character with the most unintentionally funny ‘car flirting’ scene and melodramatic love triangle that unfolds between Hunt and the two of them.

John Woo makes for some exciting moments of action but for every one of those, there’s about twenty hilariously random slo-mo shots that work for the kung-fu classics he’s known, for but in a Mission film? They feel completely incompatible and unwarranted. Also Hans Zimmer’s score here is one of the most misplaced film scores I’ve ever seen in a Hollywood film (and I say that as a huge Zimmer fan). It’s basically whatever was left on the cutting room floor of Gladiator which only adds to the overload of melodrama. 

All that being said, that’s not to say the film isn’t fun at times and doesn’t stand out in comparison to the others in the franchise, even if not for the right reasons. Half a star extra for the best mask reveal in the whole series.

Someone help me! I can’t breathe! John Williams has me in an chokehold.

Watched on Sunday April 27, 2025.

Just realising how much De Palma directs the absolute shit out of this film. I know how we always say that the Mission films, for the most part, get better as they go along, but the first might actually be the best directed in the entire series, and that’s really saying something considering the lengths at which the likes of Brad Bird and McQ were able to showcase the absolute death defying sequences that would later come to really define this franchise.

For me, this feels like Alex Garland’s most genuine work since his directorial debut, Ex-Machina. A ruthless demonstration of pure situational and atmospheric storytelling that left me completely numb. When you compare the scenes of soldier combat here to the White House raid at the end of Civil War? The latter almost feels like a sketch of sorts, and you can really see how the involvement of former Navy SEAL, Ray Mendoza, as co-director, really enhances the perspective and sincerity of what is essentially, the big final sequence of a film stretched over an hour and thirty minutes. It's an unforgiving, disorienting, shell-shocking, and at times, downright terrifying.

Seriously has me contemplating whether this is actually the best in Bong’s filmography.

Like one big blues / rock concert but with vampires, blood, sweat, fire, guns and plenty of southern drawl swagger. Coogler cooked!

Never forget how damn cool the title of this film is. It’s like Kurosawa knew that it would go on to be the absolute cinematic goliath it is, so only a title with as much aura as Seven fucking Samurai would do it justice. 

(Or maybe Dylan, it’s just because the film is literally about these seven dudes who are samurai).

Marriage Story for absolute psychopaths.

This review may contain spoilers.

''David Lindhagen cuckolded me. He made a cuckold out of me'’ is still one of the greatest lines in any film ever.

Also, I will say that although I have always been head over heels for this film (and still am), the one thing that has aged quite badly… in fact, really badly? Is the fact that Lio Tipton’s character, Jessica, gives her nudes to a minor at the very end of the film – WHAT THE HELL.

Lola if you're reading this...

Always ...

*insert Jonah Hill's laugh aaaahhh hhaaaa hah

It has many a Jurassic Park callback, I’ll give it that.

The immediate genius of Flow is its awareness of humans’ natural empathy for animals. That’s why you can be so invested in a cat for nearly an hour and thirty minutes without needing a single word of dialogue. In that sense, the film is narratively unconventional but still manages to be both conceptually and thematically rich. It’s as much a story about animals' relationship with the natural world, the cycle of life and the ing of time as it is about ‘the friends you make along the way’. 

Many of the great animated films of recent, whether it be the Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio, the Spiderverse films or even something as recent as The Wild Robot, amongst others, have so much happening in just a single frame, but it’s refreshing to see a film those ranks with a ‘less is more’ approach, really stripping the medium back to a more raw form, but never, not once, at a cost to its visual beauty. A very deserving winner of the Best Animated Feature Oscar!

For me, Novocaine definitely lacks a sense of flare, style and the overall vision to really push its high-action premise all the way. I think it has many of the components, but not quite the electricity. Give the film some of the popping colours of David Leitch’s Bullet Train, or the nuanced camerawork of Leigh Whannell’s Upgrade, or the rockstar swag of Chad Stahelski's John Wick films and I reckon we'd have a banger here. The script could have also had a bit more work but all that being said… I almost don’t care as much when you have a premise this damn fun. Jack Quaid is charming and hilarious but above all else, his character is vessel to really challenge our expectations of the viceral nature of action films. How much of us wincing, squirming and shielding our eyes from violence in film is because of what we literally see depicted on screen, and how much of it is because we know the character is feeling pain? 

All in all though, despite the film being a little vanilla and not quite reaching the full potential of it's premise, it's playful, pulpy and probably packed with enough slaps, stabs and scabs to satisfy most!

As someone who has now seen Hans’ live shows a total of five times (and counting) over the years, and pretty much knows the guy's music like the back of his hand, I was a little sceptical going into Diamond In The Desert thinking - how much was I really going to get that I hadn’t already seen before?

Well for starters, I'll say that the quality of production and editing of this concert film is simply outstanding. They alone are enough to warrant a watch of this two hours and thirty-eight minute feast for the eyes and ears. But speaking of the ears, the music is the ultimately reason we love the maestro, right? Inception, The Lion King, Pirates, The Dark Knight, Dune, Man Of Steel, Interstellar, Gladiator? They’re all here in the most epic way possible to send chills down your spine, and not to mention, intercut with conversations between Hans and some of his most iconic collaborators, from directors like Nolan and Villeneuve, to acting talent like Timmy and Zendaya, to music industry giants like Pharrell and Billie Eilish, although some definitely more enriching than others, are enough to satisfy the average viewer or the most film-broey of film bros.

On a more critical note, I'd say that since Hans' band is comprised of such a diverse range of musicians and collaborators from all corners of the world, I would have personally liked to have seen the film highlight more of them and their stories - the likes of Rusanda Panfili on violin, Pedro Eustache on flute, Juan Gárcia-Herreros on bass, Lisa Gerrard (the voice of Gladiator), Lebo M (the voice of The Lion King), Loire Cotler (the voice of Dune) and not to mention the absolute force of nature that is Tina Guo on cello, amongst plethora of other world-class artists, but hey? At least we got to witness one of the greatest guitar solos ever in Guthrie Govan (I'm not kidding, it's genuinely one of the greatest things I've witnessed).

All in all, yes it's evident that Hans loves to blow smoke up his ass a little and yes this film is a little bit of a vanity project but hey, he's the guy who made the music to The Lion King, Pirates of the Caribbean, Interstellar and the very many soundtracks to my life, so yes. You bet your ass I ate this all up.

An interesting idea to pair the cold and unrelenting nature of espionage with the melodrama of marital and co-working relationships, but alas I left the cinema feeling rather underwhelmed. The script had the right components but they never really took flight in a way that felt satisfying, and I was constantly left longing for any real sense of tension. Also, surely I’m not the only one who thought some of the performances here were just really bad?

Again, a reminder that amongst the overload of comic-book films we have available to us at this day and age, it can be easy to overlook the gems that came before unless you’re a Raimi Spiderman or a Nolan Batman, for example. Bar perhaps Logan, Matthew Vaughn’s Kick-Ass is the best R-rated comic book film we have. I’ll die on that hill.

Also, I don’t know why I never really ed it before? Perhaps it became like second nature to me being one of my all-time favourite films but I’ll be damned - the final shootout of this film is genuinely like something straight out of a Tarantino film. The foul mouthed dialogue, the western music, the over-the-top blood. It’s all very Quentin and it all works superbly.

It’s difficult to pull of both horror and comedy simultaneously, but weirdly it kind of worked for me here, at least for the most part? Stylistically it’s a lot more interesting than a lot of contemporary horror films and Osgood Perkins seems to be quite versatile in that department, really embracing a variety of aesthetics with each of his films. That being said, The Monkey definitely relies a little too much on its visuals to keep you engaged and ultimately, there’s not much in the script department that generates any real sense of momentum.  

All in all, this felt like a twisted, more violent episode of Scooby Doo that I had fun unwinding to after a long weekend but one that doesn’t really have the lasting impact I would have hoped it might.