A landmark of surreal storytelling cinema that conveys some truly insane ideas through pure dreamlike expressionism without ever saying a word. Almost unfathomable this was made 95 years ago.

This was cute! I love a good short, especially if it’s coming from my hot gay twink twins Mark and John Polonia. The score in this was so good I loved it. Can we get a Polonia brother vinyl featuring all of their classic scores across their filmography. Also I have a very important question… do we think they explored each others polonia’s? Who said that-

This is my second Buster Keaton film and while it may not be as fluid, long, or large scale as The General, the comedy and shenanigans of the auteur are still just as impressive. The simple story is entertaining enough but I’m genuinely curious into how he was able to pull off some of these risky and magical stunts on both a physical and technical level. It’s nice to know that despite how far we’ve come in the last century, there are still films like the ones of Keaton that still manage to astonish all this time later.

Hello. Is this, phone freak phantasies? 

Another day, another Hallucinations rewatch. I’ll continue to rewatch this until I’m blue in the balls. Jon McBride in here too.

I still think is the epitome of fantastic SOV horror. The Polonia brothers knew exactly what I wanted while watching SOV’s. And that’s familial issues, practical effects, and lots of male nudity. Rip John Polonia.. gone but never forgotten. And neither is that ass and dick.. who said that

This is what SOV should aspire to be! This has a great concept, practical effects, and has some genuinely good/unsettling scenes and cinematography. It’s awesome that this is the Polonia brothers second movie they made! This is definitely my favorite of the Polonia movies, I’m excited to watch more:) 

Also can we just take a second to talk about how slutty John Polonia is. He was taking every chance he could get to show off his bulge, waist, and eventually his ass. And you know what thank god he does. John Polonia the woman that you are, he’ll always be missed.

This is shitty but I loved it. The set up was so stupid it made me laugh. This is a ‘sequel’ to the first but in reality it’s beat for beat the same movie. The fact that Kelli Maroney is playing Linnea Quigley’s sister is enough to make me enjoy it. The acting and dialogue are trash but entertaining. Harold Impie is of course the highlight. Shoutout the Michelle Bauer and Brinke Stevens cameos. I liked the final characters, classic mimbo and punk girlfriend. All the familial gags at the end were funny. 

Title card: 3/5
Kill count: 6
Golden machete: Sarah
Dull machete: Dinger