Screen Simp Patron

Shouldn't you go back to the stars?

Favorite films

  • Dune: Part Two
  • Dune
  • Jurassic Park
  • The Thing

All
  • Sinners

    ★★★★★

  • Thunderbolts*

    ★★★★

  • Aliens

    ★★★★★

  • Jurassic Park

    ★★★★★

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The Thing

1982

★★★★★ Liked Rewatched

Man's Worst Friend

"I know I'm human. And if you were all these things, then you'd just attack me right now, so some of you are still human."

Getting to see this film in the cinema was such an awesome experience, what's most impressive about what John Carpenter achieved with The Thing is how rewatchable it is, retaining the same level of intrigue and terror upon every revisit. I'm sat in the cinema, watching the film for the 'I don't…

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3

2023

★★★★★ Liked Watched

"Don't look at me like a lost puppy needing somewhere soft to lie down!"

I think I spent the better part of Vol. 3 either crying or with tears in my eyes, and it's absolutely wild to me that gap between the worst of the MCU and the best it has to offer is one movie, from Quantumania to this is a giant leap. As the end of a trilogy Vol. 3 is fantastic, like Vol. 2, the narrative works…

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Sinners

2025

★★★★★ Liked Watched

"You keep dancing with the devil... one day he's gonna follow you home."

I've sat on it for a few days and I've decided Sinners is deliciously macabre perfection. I came out of it surprised and impressed, but been unable to get it out of my head. From Michael B. Jordan's fantastic performance as twins that's so good I almost forgot he is just one man, to a spiritually musical sequence that should be out of place and jarring but…

Thunderbolts*

2025

★★★★ Watched

" 'Protecting you from boring evening.' "

Thunderbolts* is, for the most part refreshing. Setting the crux of the film in mostly real time really helps it, making the film feel considerably more grounded than many of its counterparts. It does still feel restricted by certain parts of an overarching formula, and even though the 'villain's' wrath is perhaps the most unique the MCU has put out so far, it still retains certain elements of what could be considered cliche.…

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Babylon

2022

★★★★★ Liked Rewatched

"What we have here is high art, it's-"

"-Party time sparkle cocks!"

Has there been a film that so perfectly uses its commentary to tell how wonderful and important a medium cinema really is whilst also being a perfect example of it at the same time, as Babylon does? I'm not sure, but any little criticism I felt the first time just melted away coming back to it. I laughed, I cried, I fell in love, felt my heart break, and then all over again. And again, and again.

"What happens up on that screen means something."

Scream VI

2023

★★★★ Watched

"Who gives a fuck about movies?!"

The most brutal in the franchise so far, and that's a point not to be understated when these slashers are known primarily for their knife-wielding, stab-happy antagonist. Where last year's Scream became the living embodiment of the 'requel', Scream VI turns inwards again to focus on the theme of franchise, what it means when a film series becomes 'episodic' and the changes that come when a trilogy, quadrilogy, saga, becomes a franchise. Easily the…