4v291o

"Yeah.... it alright!"
- Homer commenting on Peter's favorite Beer

The movement reminds me of a floaty PS2 cutscene

“Wow, this kid is kinda Like Mike.”
- Me

Gosh I really wish I knew what game these fellas were playing… 😞

Lil' Bow Wow: “I got you fam!”

“I will die!”
- Deepercut Doc Ock

It looks like an 80s movie but it's written so 2000s and that combination hurts my head.

"I know where you live~!"
- Garfield (credited as "the Fat Cat")

Scene: (INTERIOR: A stage in Garfieldland, Garfield must Tango against a Gigachad Furry for the heart of Arlene.)
"Get off my lasanga." Garf says dramatically, ripping off Rodrigo or whatever his name's arm.
GASP: IT'S FUCKING NERMAL
END SCENE

This movie has the same director as Spawn

"I'm gonna give you 30 seconds and if this jungle doesn't eat you up alive, I will."
- Vaas Montenegro, Far Cry 3 (2012)

Not a huge fan of Christopher Mintz-Plasse but it's worth it for Vaas.

“They're after me FUCKING charms”

Are you taking the piss!? Are you acting the mickey!? Did you FUCKING think Leprechaun Week was over?! Oh no no no! We have to review The Leprechaun's Game from 2020, directed by Louisa Warren, director of modern classics like Tooth Fairy: Queen of Pain and Dirty Work! And starring a a bunch of people I've never heard of including people who were in similar movies like Bao Tieu (the Leprechaun in this) who played Caged Man in Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey and the Grub Double (uncredited) in Artemis Fowl, or people like Daniel Sawicki who was apparently only in this movie. Also some youtuber named Shawn C. Phillips over a Zoom call, no idea who he is but noted…

I sometimes think that film crItics from the 90s would actually have a heart attack if they saw the low budget horror of today. Let me preface this by telling you the tale of all the unnecessary hoops I had to go through to watch this shit: I was watching it on Tubi (bad start I know) and decided to take a break. When I returned it was suddenly gone (it said “expires in 1 day” not “expires TODAY” fucking Christ.)
I looked for a while and found the movie on Roku, but upon watching I noticed the beginning was different. Out of curiosity I watched until the title screen came up, turns out it's the fucking sequel The Leprechaun's Curse under the wrong name.
The last place it was on (according to my television) was PlutoTV, and while it was indeed the right movie, it was in Spanish and I can't fucking figure out how to fucking change it. This movie is not worth this hassle, and I was about to give up…. but alas… it's on youtube…

This is one of those no budget horror movies with Nostalgia Critic tier special fx where they reuse the same locations over and over, if you've seen one you'll know what to expect. I really don't wanna be mean, but my god is the acting bad. I don't expect Shakespearean quality but for fucks sake the Grumpy Cat movie cast had more emotion then this fucking trash. I would genuinely rather watch Paranormal Activity again. I've seen shot on shideo movies that were better than this fucking shit. Whoever tf saw Jigsaw from Saw and Twoface from Batman and thought, “Hmmmm what if I combined these characters into a Leprechaun with a shitty Halloween Mask?” I'm going to find you. I'm going to kill you. It was a REAL bold choice to use the built in camera microphone, but they accidentally made the music too quiet, I can almost ACTUALLY HEAR THE DIALOG.

Yea it's honestly not worth talking about beyond that. I could say the opening text crawl(s) look like a Sony Vegas plug-in, or mention how the Leprechaun is played by a man of average stature, or how looking for the movie genuinely stressed me out more than I'd like to it (Google Docs didn't help with that idk what is up, shit keeps randomly deleting words and randomly capitalizing others). I could also mention the inconsistent sound quality or the fact it's filmed in whatever random rooms they could find, and I could make fun of the shitty vocal effect they added to the shitty Leprechaun in the shitty mask or how he only has 1 article of green clothing. AND I could mention how the dude paying these chuckle-fucks to find the Leprechaun's gold keeps hyping up how much he pays and it ends up just being 100 grand (which is a lot but he just kept going I don't fucking care), or how the soundtrack sounds like GarageBand samples, or how they keep acting like they're criminals “on one last job” but they're just dicking around the woods looking for a pot of gold, and how they use stock footage of a cat for a transition. But I won't. I'll just say the best part of this movie is it's over before you know it.

I cannot justify a single star, I would give it zero if I could. ½★ go actually fuck yourself, Leprechaun Week is canceled, suck my dick and balls.

"Work is the death of freedom as we know it."

May the road rise up to meet you! Welcome to Day 4 of Leprechaun Week🍀! The week where any magic I had left in my soul is stolen by these STUPID green goblins. Todays movie is The Magical Legend of the Leprechauns from 1999, directed by John Henderson who did some Spitting Image, some Mr. Bean, some Doctor Who. And staring Randy Quaid, Kieran Culkin, a bunch of red haired people, and Whoopi Goldberg. I can't believe they woked (up) my Leprechaun movies 😞. This is BULLOCKS (wrong island). Never Mind the Bollocks, Here's the Sexprechauns!

Word of warning: this is a 2 episode miniseries and it's almost 3 hours in total, I did not know this when I picked it for Leprechaun Week™.

It's really weird to see Randy Quaid acting like a normal human being, I mean I know he's acting but still. He does turn beatred when he takes a shot of the magical liquor that let's you see Leprechauns after "accidentally" spying on a beautiful skinny dipping lady, so.... there's that.

This is the first movie of the Leprechaun Week™ where the Leprechauns aren't played by dwarves, but instead regular sized folk shrunken down with movie magic. I like both methods of Leprechaunization. This movie has more than Leprechauns tho, it also had Fairies, a Dullahan, and even a Banshee! The Fairy Kingdom in the Sky really reminds me of a PC game and I love it. The movie is pretty odd tho and while not always in a good way, there's certainly never a dull moment. Example when he runs away from the naked lady's brothers and goes into a church, and the chase just kinda fizzles out.

The locations in this movie are absolutely beautiful, such lovely emerald greens and colorful flowers. Yea it's probably color correction but I don't care it's pretty. Even tho this is a TV movie, it's obviously got the most famous actors, and I think it has the highest budget tho that's not saying much. Tho some of the effects probably weren't meant to be seen on an HDTV. The most unbelievable thing about this movie is that Randy Quaid could outrun anyone.

Do you like Television Movies with elaborate cheesy costumes but grand ideas? Me too, and I liked this quite a bit! You'll probably like it too! One day of Leprechaun Week™ left so don't say goodbye yet friends!

“It's the weight of the gold in his pockets that makes us the little people! (Without gold) we grow obviously! Giant size, so big that we POP! POP! And then we're gone POP!”

- Finn Regan McCool, Last King of the Leprechauns

DON'T TOUCH TOUCH THAT DIAL! 🍀 WE'RE BACK TO LEPRECHAUN WEEK HERE ON LETTERBOXD! (beh boo, bah boo) Today's film is 1998's The Last Leprechaun…. STARING: Jack Scalia from Tequila and Bonetti as Henry, and Veronica Hamel from Hill Street Blues as Laura.

IF YOU'RE READING THIS, IT MEANS YOU PAID THE SHAKE DOWN! NO REFUNDS!
I honestly thought this would be the worst one but this is closer to the kind of low budget kids movies I like than the last movie. This one even has a moaning CG Banshee oooo~! The special effects are very DCOM and I mean that in a good way, I absolutely adore the Leprechaun’s cozy little tree house and his elaborate Rube Goldberg alarm. Also he's a Catholic Hail Mary. His makeup is able (it looks better than the poster trust me) and his outfit is WAY better looking than the Unlucky Leprechaun. Sorry lemme show him some respect, his name is Finn Regan McCool, and he's sort of an inventor. What a fun little guy! 😊 He steals eggs tho which isn't cool in today's economy. Well he at least pays for the milk so maybe he factored In the price of both. A little bag of eggs and a few tiny ladles of milk cost 1 gold coin, noted.

The main characters are a brother and sister named Tommy and Ethel. They're a fun duo, I wish MY brother would make fun of our step-mom's hat with me. Ignore the fact that I don't have a stepmother. Simpson, who I think is the butler, eats a jam tart in a way where he gets jam all over his nose. And he summons banshees and shit? I'll be completely honest it took me a minute to figure out who's who and how everyone fits together in the story, I might be stupid. There is also Mary the lovely cook who has many games for the children to play.

Ok focus Tristen… uh the plot! So it's about Simpson the butler summoning a Banshee to possess Laura, who’s new step children are coming from America to spend the summer with her. At the same time, her construction company is threatening the life of our little friend Finn, the last Leprechaun left. There's so much creativity and fun ideas, honest to God I'm leaving this review spoiler free so you can check it out for yourself.

The sets are also noteworthy in that they aren't distractingly cheap. It's weird how the boy calls a beautiful mansion a dump tho. The special effects are fun, the sets are good, I really don't see why everyone on here didn't like it. Honest to God, I loved this, I'm kind of tempted to give it a 4…hmmmm…. Eh fuck it it's my review! 4★! This movie made me quite happy, hope the next one doesn’t sour it! Don't forget to us tomorrow for Leprechaun Week!

(I wish I had a good brother who'd get me this on DVD or VHS or something)

“As a Leprechaun, I'm a loser!”
- Beta Cuck Ass Leprechaun

Happy Greenday! 🍀 Welcome to Paradise! Welcome to Day 2 of Leprechaun Week 2025, 5 epic reviews of the 5 epic movies staring at least 5 epic Leprechauns! Todays film is A Very Unlucky Leprechan, once again featuring Warwick Davis as a Leprechaun, as well as being produced by B movie legend Roger Corman.

First off both versions of a Leprechaun played by Davis have notable bugs on them, but this one does not EAT them. Also in this movie 4 leaf clovers make Leprechauns “lucky for a hundred years” instead of like, making them mortal and draining their powers. That movie ends with him in a well and in this one he lives in a well. Also this Leprechaun can fly and shit. Both of them come out of fridges, both of them feature go karts, and both of them kill, this one happens to kill my hope and joy.

This movie is fucking weird man, the little girl is played by 2 actresses and according to IMDb, at least one of them was 20 when this came out. Did they do “a Lord of the Rings” or was this woman just really short or is IMDb wrong? None of these questions will be answered because no one cares.

But I'm getting ahead of myself the film is about a little adult girl person named Molly moving to Ireland cuz her dad is a failure of an author and their uncle left them his house when he died. It is much like the movie Dragonworld, a movie I watched after a Ren Faire a year ago but forgot to review. They get to the house after almost running the little beastie over and meet an old gardener named Mr. Mulligan, who believes in mythical creatures and fae folk, FUELING the 1800s Anti-Irish stereotype that they are stupid and silly and perhaps a bit goofy? I myself believe in fairies (and Santa Christ) so take what I say with a grain of clove…. that was terrible I'm sorry…. Apparently the house called (Mis)Fortune Manor is bad luck, big shock, as the dad puts Mulligan in his place for…. believing in Leprechauns in front of his daughter? Beta cuck has no right to tell anyone what to do he reads his boring ass books to his daughter at night and she falls asleep. Anyway Molly wished on a wishing well to go back to Chicago (most unrealistic part of the movie) but she used a penny, and the Leprechaun says “come back when you're a little, mmmmmmmmm richer!”

If you need an idea of the tone and quality of this picture, the main villain's name Is Mayor McGreedy. The sets are incredibly cheap, a lot of white signs with plain text cheap, random furniture leftover from other productions cheap, the Leprechaun doesn’t even even have a proper hat cheap it's just a vaguely molded cloth on his head. You can clearly see a green screen in a different room in the background when Principal O’Boyle (😑) makes Molly clean the bathroom with a toothbrush.

I have never in my life heard of a Six Legged Starfish being lucky but I digress there's one in this movie, and it's a weird rubber puppet, and it talks. And it starts rolling at the speed of sound across wet cement that McGreedy is forcing construction workers to blow on to make it dry quicker. There's also a romance subplot between the dad and some lady that saves Molly and decorates their house.

This is one of those annoying movies where everything and everyone is out to get the main character and I don't wanna think about it anymore. Yea it's got some charm and whimsy, but it's also obnoxious and it gave me a headache. I usually like movies about fae and stuff but this wasn't it dawg.

me tomorrow for hopefully something less stupid...

"There was an old man of Madras whose balls were made of fine brass. So in stormy weather they both clang together and sparks flew out of his ass."
- The Wee Little Leprechaun

Happy (late) Saint Patrick’s Day! 🍀 Kiss/pinch me I'm (13%) Irish! Welcome to Leprechaun Week, 5 Days of 5 Reviews of movies staring the lucky little creatures! Todays film is the cult classic 93 horror movie simply titled Leprechaun, notably staring Jennifer Aniston who would go on to play Rachel in the hit NBS sitcom Friends in 94, as well as Warwick Davis one of my favorite actors from the UK.

(I know Leprechauns have nothing to do with Saint Patrick’s Day but whatever🤷‍♂️)

I try to watch this movie every year so I might be biased, but this movie tickles my funny bone in the way only a good old comedy horror movie can. I can the first time I watched it, I was a teenager I believe, and I didn't really understand the appeal until the titular Leprechaun kills a man by Pogoing on his chest. After that I understood the movie's allure, and now I have a yearly tradition for a holiday I usually paid no mind to.

Warwick as the Leprechaun is probably the best part of the movie, he always brings his all into a performance and in the process created an iconic character that sort of took on a life of its own. He's creepy always standing in dark, he’s silly spitting riddles and rhymes, but when it comes to his gold his attitude gets stark, so they better get it back in time! The makeup is equal parts impressive and funny, if I had to describe it I'd say he looks like a wrinkled chimpanzee mixed with a Who. His portrayal of a Leprechaun is honestly how I'd imagine European folktale fae creatures would interact in a modern American setting, specifically the scene of him imitating the police officer.

I also find the scenes without the Leprechaun weirdly charming. I think I might just like movies that don't try to rush themselves, so I enjoy when the movie has these characters interact outside the conflict more than I thought I would have. They don't usually have the most interesting dialog but they're QUITE the buch of specimens; Jennifer Aniston's character Tory flips between being a spoiled pouty city girl to being horny for Nathan, who in turn is a handsome tanned working man with almost no personality. Ozzie, played by Mark Holton, is a dim witted oaf who along with Nathan and his 10-year-old brother Alex, run a house painting service called 3 Guys That FUCKING Paint. I think one of the important things in a horror movie is to make your characters likeable and I’d say they succeeded.

Now I'm not trying to OVERSELL this movie, because it's incredibly stupid. Beyond stupid. Its about a Leprechaun, (buckles, striped stockings, bright green suit and top hat) killing people in search of his gold. If you can accept this for the premise of a movie, you'll probably enjoy it.

Uh to give the movie some more objective criticism beyond just calling it stupid; the dad character is barely in the movie and could've been written off, a lot of the camera work (outside of the random rolling dutch angles in retirement home) is pretty unremarkable, it doesn't actually know what it actually wants it’s audience to be, the characters have no arcs period, a lot of the dialog between 4 protagonists feels phoned in, the characters tend to state what's going on or what happened off screen, the soundtrack is randomly whimsical in scenes I feel should have been more comedic, and while the pacing is fine, it ends very abruptly.

I think the most notable thing about this movie is the franchise that spawned from it, and at the time of writing this, 7 sequels of which I've seen none. They look like they get even stupider as the series goes on, with notable entries like Leprechaun 4: In Space, or the 5th and 6th entries titled Leprechaun in the Hood and Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood, the former featuring Ice-T. Also I guess the quote I used at the top is from the 3rd movie, my bad I could have sworn it was in the original.

I'll probably get around to watching and reviewing the sequels in the following years, but for now let's give this one a score of 2½★, and don't forget to me tomorrow for day 2 of Leprechaun Week!

“I promised my dad I'd go with him for a hostile takeover in Tokyo.”
- one of Richie’s rich friends that disappear

If you like goofy cornball 90s kid's movies, you can do a lot worse than Ri¢hie Ri¢h, I actually quite enjoyed it.

I'm more of a Casper guy for my Harvey Comics fix, but I digress. (I honestly forgot this was even based on a comic until I found out the villian's name is fucking Lawrence Van Dough.)

+2★ for the Alan Silvestri soundtrack
+2★ for Cadbury's loyalty
-1★ for building their wealth on the blood of the exploited working class

"You're gonna sell me some gas now."
- Wilford Brimley or older Axl Rose idk

Edit Plumbobs onto their heads, jumble the dialog, and you my friend have a The Sims movie.

Kinda bugged me when people would compare this to Troll 2 or The Room, cuz it didn't really earn that. And now nobody really talks about it.

½★ for the bird hitting the window.

"God...forgive me. [kills himself]"
- Johnny (spoiler)

Haha, what a movie Tommy!

Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my script? It took me years to write, give it a flip? It's based on a song by a bloke named John. And I need a job, so I want to be a [screenplay] writer!

Sometimes I struggle to justify Paul being my favorite Beatle.

"I thought you were one a those darn kids after me lucky neck meats!"
- Turkeyneck

12 minutes in:
OH MY FUCKING GOD
I CANNOT ESCAPE THESE STUPID FUCKING PETS
THEY FOLLOW ME NO MATTER WHERE I ROAM

also:
Not my Bella!

“You have butt parts?”

I don't know how much more I can take

Colorful Harmless Fun

I would actually fuck these crayons
Not the girl ones tho, that's gay

Pre-K Classroom Background Footage

I'm sure a lot of you around my age the tv commercials in the late 2000s to order this (special DVD offer). While I never really gave it much thought, I always assumed there was like, at least a LITTLE bit of an educational angle to it.

It's literally JUST footage of Trains (with some coot singing about how much he likes trains over country/blues instruments), and no commentary on the trains or information on how they work or anything.

I'm not saying there's no educational value for young children in something that's almost entirely visual, but it really is just Lots and Lots of Trains and not much more to offer.

Trains are awesome tho so I ain't exactly complaining.

No I didn't actually sit through this whole thing lmao, and I'm gonna assume the rest of the series is the same.

Strawinsky Models + Foodfight! Textures + Norm of the North Movement + Felix the Cat Logic + Magic Voyage Yapping = Goat Story (Kozí Příběh)

Classic Česko folktale:
Boy asks Father, "Dad, what is goat?"
Father takes Boy to goat farm and points, "Is goat, see?"

Runoff from the Shrek-Hoodwinked Pipeline

The foodchain... You see, on top there's Shrek 1 and 2, there's Puss 2, then there's the rest of the sequels.

There's Hoodwinked, there's Donkey Xote.

There's Chicken Little, there's Hoodwinked 2, there's Wizard SO-SO... and then there's you.

"I'm frightfully funny, frightfully friendly and I can make all your dreams come true"
- Flip the GREEN Clown

This movie is a bad cut of a great movie that we never actually got (at least in this dimension).

Lemme explain my esoteric statement: a lot of the pieces of a great film are here, the animation is beautiful, the locations (although obviously just adapted from the comic) are wonderfully creative, and the score, while nothing crazy, is quite pleasant. It all goes downhill in of the story, the pacing, the editing, if you've read about the troubled development of this movie this shouldn't be surprising, but it does make me wonder if there was any possibility of this movie actually ending up good.

I don't wanna be mean but Nemo himself is such fluff, no hate on the kid who voices him he does a fine enough job, he doesn't slur his words and he can emote well enough. My issue is he rarely has anything insightful or interesting to say, all of his dialog reminds me of Fluke Starbucker from Hardware Wars. "YIPPEE! 😀" "GOLLY! 😮" You know, that kinda airheaded nothing. Now I've only read a handful of the comics, and despite the occasional racism, they're pretty dang good, but can someone tell me if Icarus is Nemo's pet outside of Slumberland? From what I've seen online it seems like Icarus isn't real, but he is in this movie which is super weird, there's just a talking Squirrel with aviator goggles and no one is freaking out.

The characters are all just kinda there, and I know they exist in a dream, and dreams don't really have structure, but this is a MOVIE. Example: Professor Genius just straight up tells Nemo it's not his fault for disobeying the King's order and opening the door, and he gives no other input. It IS Nemo's fault what do you mean you old coot? Flip is a pretty fun character all things considered, despite his vague resemblance to a minstrel show act that looney tunes would pull from syndication. He's voiced by the legendary Mickey Rooney, who you might know as Santa in most Rankin/Bass specials, but I know him as Mr. Cherrywood from The Care Bears Movie cuz I'm better than you. Where was I....

So Flip (who has a giant bird named Flap) is the town con artist, always getting into trouble, probably my favorite character in the movie. (EDIT: Bon Bon is my favorite character idk what I was on.) The King is just a close second tho, I have a soft spot for goofy old men who can lock in and become serious at a moment's notice. His daughter tho, the Princess, god... ok I know I said I wasn't gonna be mean but the voice actress isn't.... great. She also keeps flipping between an English and American accent when she's first introduced which reminds me of Princess Leia, the big difference is that movie was SAVED by the editing.

The story structure is something else entirely: it takes damn near 20 MINUTES to get to Slumberland, and what's there isn't important or even interesting, it's just fluff and padding. There's a random little scene that's about a minute long of Nemo pretending to sleepwalk and stealing a pie his mother made, and it gets brought up at the very end to give you the illusion it had a point. It's incredibly awkward and should have been cut. Halfway through the movie Nemo wakes up, and it's not a break from the dreams to flesh out the real world, no he's still IN THE DREAM, and it just wastes time reuniting all the characters and God did this movie NEED this? They could've just had Nemo get punished for his wrong doing but decide to step up and right his wrongs WITHOUT STOPPING THE MOMENTUM OF THE MOVIE! And guess what? An hour in it happens again. Yep he wakes up but no he's actually still dreaming and the stupid FUCKING goblins are under his bed. Technically the goblins are important characters to the plot but who cares, they're just more fluff. Nemo's bed starts walking, which is probably the most recognizable thing from the franchise, and we finally get to meet the villain. The Nightmare King.

While he has a pretty cool design, his voice is lame. He talks in baby talk for some reason (?) and his voice doesn't BOOM like you would think from looking at him. While the climax is ok, the movie did not earn the silence after it, nothing grand enough happened to warrant this to paraphrase Doug Walker.

Overall just like this review, Little Nemo: Adventures in Slumberland is a mess, a very beautiful mess but not worth the watch unless you're SUPER into animation or are studying to become an animator. Just watch the short film that was made to pitch this movie (there's 3 but this is the best one), it's even more visually inspired and it doesn't overstay its welcome.

+4★ for the animation
-2★ for the editing and structure
And let's sayyyy
+½★ for Bon Bon the cute clown paige, I'm a sucker for silly little clowns

#速度与激情9# 早上好中国 现在我有冰激淋 我很喜欢冰激淋 但是《速度与激情9》比冰激淋…… 我强奸鸭子

Now we are back(to the shack) to the beginning as Skinny berates the Villian for tax fraud. Fat sees this and looks over to the beginning on the movie, with ducks in cage(the elephant(6))s as they quacking argue. They don't want the help of a BITCH as Fat steals the duck to speeeeen them like basketcaseball. Fun fact: basketball 🏀 is the most popular sport in China 🇨🇳! Greeny pulls an Amazing Spider-Man and says “Do NOT fuck daughter after I'm deep fried in hot oil and bisquick” (actual quote from Amazing Spider-Movie) while Haig usurps the Green Throne as the men waste ammo. Fat eats the butt of an onion and duck farts (🤨) and “accidentally” knocks himself out as green duck ( him?) frees himself with the power of friendship. Fat tries to fuck up by trying to cut the head off even tho I'm pretty sure you give ducks head ( 😏 ) in Chinese cooKing, but wait, Green is Gone… they have an epic battle and it ends in a decisive Duck Victory! He ties his new human BITCH up and plans to duck him in the butt. The luggage (ed him?) crawls up the building with Villian and Son Sun Duck, as her conTRAPtion steals Shinesprites, while the ducks all rendezvous. But it may be tooooooooooooo(t toot chugging chugga big red car(k) 🚗 😀 )) late 😞.

She turns out to be ugly, and ugly people never win! The Son Sun Tsun Duck gets trapped in luggoland and discovers many many screens (ok boomer) that tell him the plot of the movie. Her machine sucks the ducks and takes the sun's peepee and becomes peapea. “Do you even love me daddy?” “Uh noooo? Le stupid BIIIIIIITCH!” Who let the ducks out? The door that's who! Society that's who! Ok so now ugly's walking chair brings her to screens as ducks attempt to fuck satellite, she uses this fucks energy to become young and beautiful even tho she was already doing a good job faking it(?). Her boobs get perky this movie is so ducked up DON’T LET YOUR KIDS WATCH THIS! His epic gamer skills allow him to maneuver the zelda temple as he tells his gf to kick bricks. The day is saved! oh wait no

The ducks of the orient block Sun beam but the Villian has a spare antenna. The sun is finally fulfilling it's destiny (the witch queen) as the green fart cloud destroys the cop. The villian gets captured by THE CLAW as the Son Sun Tsun C'une Duck sacrifices himself to save the world, and I have no idea what happened to the villian I might have blinked.

They sift through the rubble to find Sunny's body, and he didn't die cuz… uh…. REDACTED. The cop's dog powerlifts a door as he he sees villian's TRUE FACE, and he still thinks she's beautiful. Skinny and Fat chew the fat (litterally) as the credits roll, and Fat finally opens his yapper as Haig quotes Captain (Little) Nemo. The ducks are allowed fuck as they travel to Hawaii to colonize, and the Aegean Sea is restored.

Everybody got that?
...
4/4

"Stealing ducks from the preserve is punishable by death by firing squad!"

The birds are blowing bubble gum but something is a foot 🤔. The hot duck teaches the main lad to fly as Skinny continues to enlarge ears, he creates whirl pool (HM6) to suck the duck he wants, but stupidly kicks his booty. The ducks soar in front of the Moon(light on Vermont) and give eachother bugs (life 2) while the pacing still sucks. They plan to inactive OPERATION M.O.T.H.E.R.D.U.C.K.E.R. but he's racist and she leaves. The boats in this movie move like Adam Sandle Vampire, and it scares me.

The mallards are enjoying (Taking Back) Sunday when they notice the duck lake is gone 😱. But now it's war! The Mallards decide to... disguise as Chinese.... 🤨. The main Duck says no I drain Loch Ness please don't be mad at the racist ducks, and Dad grounds him from Vidya. Green General Car Insurance duck gets kicked off the mountain for being RACIST! And he gets captured by Skinny x Fat while Alexander Haig claims to be in control now.

Oh no! Main Duck discover(y channel)ed that HE is both son duck, and Sun Duck 😱. And now he flys off to save Greeny. Fat and Skinny chew the fat (metaphorical) and discuss Duck lore. The cop and his BLUE dog plan to fuck the villian. The cop actually says he's gonna kill Skinny and Fat by firing squad.... God she's got that GYATT as she tells the pig to fuck off. She Spider Monkeys her way to steal main duckcock Joey Joe Joe (that's the worst name I ever heard 😞). Now the unlikely partners are caged together in a SQUEEEEEEEEEZING mechanism. The Emporer duck has to quickly teach the others to fly as our main pair is now dinner (mmmmm steamed ducks (yes and you call them steamed ducks despite the fact they're obviously deep fried (...you know.....one thing I should......excuses me for one second) of course))
...
3/4

这些鸭子很有趣哈哈

I AM BACK AND MORE EPIC THAN EVER
After the misfortune of those FUCKING Penguins, the main Cuck checks on dad to see why he does Yogurt to raise the roof (sun). Daddy be like "we are Chinese we do NOT fly!" and he sulk away. Turn out, the boy is the CHOSEN DUCKER who help sun from turning to pea!!??? 😱

We go to Ch*nese P*ople who steal rocks from a cart man to eat. They do NOT sell rocks at my local Carrs Chinese Food section, idk who to believe... they get chased by a kop and one is fat and tall, while the other.......... is skinny and small 😏. They run into the tunnel they sealed Gordon the Tank(ie) engine into, but his ghost comes back to drive them out of his home and restore train purity. Beautiful lady comes off the train and they play a stolen version of the song from the LittleBigPlanet 2 trailer. She is super skinny and has NO reason to have jiggles but she does and I'm not DUCKING complaining for fucks sake.... I think I'm quacked.... the train becomes a luggage, abd she needs to go to the mallard mansion and pays them in 3 quarters (I would've done it for 2 suckerrrrr) and we cut to main duck, who I call Marvin, moping. Not mopping! Moping. The main duck plans to violate Soviet airspace to prove the earth is the shape of you, but he gets cold (turkey) feet. WHO LET THE FUCKING DUCKS OOT the Mallads come in search of.... some fantasy island called Ha-whyee... more like Hawk 2 hahaha. I hope my Reddit karma stocks are doing ok. The main Mallard is accompanied by a DUCK with Mardi Gras colored hair and she disappear into bubble gum. The green ducks destroy an ancient egg. The men of Baja are continuing to ask about the wearabouts of dogs, someone please tell them 😞. He says beHOLD my duckcock to his soldier ducks and he cannot tell the buff ducks are not his daughter. There's a meeting between the two FUCKING ducks of different cultures. The dogs are lost in China and then daddy CHEE-HINA (the duck says it don't get me at me) gets into a fight with GI Chicken Joe and they kick reeds.

They talk about the "enemy" over some a nice cup of Lapshang Souchoun tea. The Cop human oogles the babe through the paper windows as Skinny and Fat try to rob her. The cop stops them like a SIMP and takes their picture cuz guns are too American 🇺🇸🦅🍔. She hires the robbers so they don't get arrested to steal for her, I think she's supposed to be European but idk, I'd fuck her... I mean.... the cop comes back and they have a breaking dance/c-rap battle. She is looking for a duck, even tho they're in thr park for free. I just noticed the main villian is wearing a long sleeve white shirt, i thought she was wearing a sleavless thingy that goes up to your booboes. Dad and Main Duck argue about flying and he goes through the toilet to fuck. They chat about their duck cocks being "soft..... yknow.... soft..." They lock the daughter in Sex Calderon and the Ducks meet. Why is the general green duck's daughter a Mandarin duck? Is she adopted? They talk like Mickey Mouse and that Prince or Pauper, and we learn the ducks are very very easy to anger. She calls him a "dumb Manderin" which sounds racist. Skinny and Fat train to steal ducks and he morphs his ear big with EVIL Cronenburgian magic. The boat moves like a fever dream. The romance starts to blossom when Fat gives Skinny mouth to mouth 😏. The General green duck dresses like LBJ and drinks his epic drink, as they text each other with rocks. The dad's sepperate the children and they reunite at night when she swam through toilet world. My power went out so.... I guess that's how the movie ends?
...
2/4

"Besides, a duck who wears glasses, looks very sexy!"

I don't give a DUCK what you have to say boomer! 😱
The young epic Yellow Donald and the BOOMBA Green Daffy are in a shape shifted cage thingy and being held by a hot lady with tiny boobs that still have jiggle physics. Then the movie says "you're probably wondering how we got here" and no not really but ok. So the Duck with Attitude play shitty game on his iPad with Magnavox Odyssey cartridges and tells he's his dad he's BORED of vidya (not epic, real beta behavior right there kid). "Years ago, I was Chinese!" Dad thinks he's Chanticlear, rising the sun with his EVIL Kung-Fu magic. People who look and sound different than me scare me.

A bunch of DUCKTARDED green ducks fly to Chinatown thinking they're in Hawaii (both are equally spooky to me) WHO LET THE DUCKS OUT and then the Dad and the leader of the Ugly Fucking Greens get into an EPIC fight (I was cheering for the white-coded fowl). Then main anime duck meets a duck girl and tries to do what ducks do best (non-consentual sex) but she says no dice then he calls the green white duck leader crazy but oh no, that's HER dad! 😱 I stopped paying attention for a while after this.

I'll be honest I turned the movie off after the boy duck with Sora hair and the girl duck with EZ Squirt hair got separated by their daddies, then the girl swam through the toilet to see him.
It's kinda ducking boring ngl.
...
1/4

Middle Class Sickday Blandness

Real talk upfront: I hate this movie.
I feel like every time I stayed home from school and I turned on Disney Channel, it was on.

"Now I know how a meatball feels!"

[(Booooooo!) (Get off!) (Get off of here!)]
"Ok! Ok! Next time we'll have the real thing!"

Boy Scout Camp Comfort Film

I did not know Whitney's dad was drunk when I was a kid, I thought he was just a clumsy goof.

I also thought he died of like a disease or something.

“You furballs never stop yappin’!”
-🦜

The triumphant return of Alvin Rich "The Alpha" the Parrot and the other 2.

"Human's are turning our food... into butt cream?"

L.A. Noire? It's back, in Squirrel form!

(This would honestly make an epic video game.)

(Profiterole violently shitting himself)
- Profiterole

All the 4Kids VAs were desperate for work after daddy went bankrupt.

There's no background music or SFX, and it reminds me of those YouTube Shorts edits of movies and shows, usually with Notion by the Rare Occasions added.

Garfield goes to the real world dude...

They had to add random characters (and sparkly bubbles to the car exhausts) at the beginning to differentiate the comic world and the real world.

Me and my twin got so sick of this we started discussing Israel-Palestine conflict so...

"As the Alpha of this house Bella, I can do whatever I want!"
- Alvin Rich "The Alpha" "Squaky Al" the Parrot

Oh my fucking god

"And do you know, he came to a house, and said, 'Speak roughly to your little boy! And beat him when he sneezes!'"

- Horny Parade Announcer who calls things Gay

When you Google this movie, it calls it a Horror/Musical, which got me thinking:

Does a movie have to be INTENTIONALLY scary to be a horror movie?

"Well you're not exactly anorexic"
- Mall Santa to a Fat Kid

Haliey Welch was so fucking close to making Hawk Tuah Christmas

“…we're gonna go in tomorrow and start grabbing kids? ‘Oooo! Everybody get in the van!’”
- French Stewart pretending to be Marv

How do these keep getting worse?

“You… SMACKED… my winky…”

Kid pulls a fucking gun on the bad guy?
That's the John Hughes I love

The gun turns out to be a bubble gun?
That's the John Hughes I hate

"Maybe they don't forget about you, but they forget to you. l don't think people mean to forget. l think it just happens."
- Kevin McCallister

Second verse, same as the first!
(But just a little bit worse!)

It's a great movie but I have such a hard time watching the beginning with his shitty family.

"Say no to Ogrecide!"
- Ella and Areida protesting the KOGREan War

Live action Shrek
2004 was NOT ready for this masterpiece

"Nick, there's been one thing that's been eating at me since I've been here. That Naughty-Nice List that you got? There's no naughty kids, Nick. They're all good kids. But some of them are scared. And some of them don't feel listened to. Some of them had some pretty tough breaks too. But every kid deserves a present on Christmas." - Fred Claus

There's a powerful scene at the end with Santa talking to the Kevster about him being bullied and ending up as the naughtiest kid, and while I watch it I sit there. I sit there and think of all the dumb slapstick (with sfx) this movie had been giving me...

I don't know why God allowed this movie to be made

Sucks Ass!

Turns out half of my memories of this movie are actually from the 2007 film Fred Claus, so this movie permanently feels like half a movie to me.

● No Bernard
● Worse effects than the original from 1994
● No Vince Vaughn
● Ms. Claus didn't get old and fat for some reason
● No Paul Giamatti
● The father-in-law acts like he's on strong pain killers
● I hate Christmas
● Jack Frost is a molester, he's a CHIIIIIIIILD molester

They never played this one TV, IDK why!

I feel like this had the potential to be a great Christmas movie but there's too much stuff for it's runtime to flesh out. I don't know if I would make it longer, but I also don't know what I'd cut out. The budget is 3 times bigger than the first and ALL OF IT went to Bernard's yarn hair.

Real talk: I absolutely adore the scene at the Christmas party where Santa is giving all the adults toys they loved as kids. It's very heartwarming.

All time middle class cable classic!

Shoestring budget ($22 million, more than the GDP of Mypos) but everyone gives it there all, especially Bernard. He acts like being an Elf in the North Pole is the most stressful job in the world, which it probably is idk I've yet to meet an Elf.

I met Santa once though and he looks nothing like Tim "Tim "The Toolman" Taylor" Allen.

This movie treats Christmas like a cult and I hate it

In like 2020 or 2021 at the local bookstore they had wrapped mystery books, and I got Skipping Christmas which apparently this movie was based on

If I ever get around to reading it I'll let y'all know if it's better or worse

ProJared tries to remove the culture from the Queen

-2★ cuz we didn't see if Sean colored on the flight

A decade ago at Walmart I saw 2 DVDs next to eachother; Tooth Fairy 2, and Jingle All the Way 2, both staring Larry the Cable Guy, the blue collar comedian who was big when I was a kid.

Now Tooth Fairy I saw once in middle school and forgot about it, but Jingle All the Way? I watch that every year! It's certainly one if the dumbest movies I've seen, but I think it's fun and entertaining.

Now to the main point, this "sequel".

This is one of those cheep cash grabs shot on a random lot in Canada, and then slapped on a DVD and sent to Walmart for an unexpecting handsome man to see, then watch and review 10 years later.

The only through-line between this movie and Jingle All the Way 1996 is the main character (Larry) is looking for a toy. And it's not even a relevant toy to 2014, it's a Teddy Ruxpin with limited AI, the mouth doesn't even fucking move tho... so I guess it's not an apt comparison. Turboman was a great Power Rangers stand in and represented those 90s toy crazes like Tickle Me Elmo.

It's also shot in short ing, unconnected shorts in the worst way possible (good example of how to do it right is National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation).

I honestly regret writing more than just "it stinks" almost as much as I regret watching it.

Why tf does Toy Traders have both a logo that uses the Toy Story Font, AND no rules to prevent scalping? This is too much low budget goofiness for me to handle.

Why do the old twin ladies kick Larry in his snowballs? He just wanted the stupid FUCKING bear.

Why does the mechanical bull operator risk killing a man for 50 bucks?

Fuck this stupid fucking movie why did he need the homeless outfit just to sit on Santa's lap? Is it just to set up the rest of the scene? I'm honestly writing this review in real time at this point. He looks like a damn scarecrow.

Larry said "Epic Fail", I cannot believe this. +1★

Merry Christmas!

I love this movie but it is complete cornball goofy ahh 90s schmuck shit.

Especially by the end when Arnold (I mean Howard sorry) is fucking flying around the parade on a jetpack

+3★ cuz Phil Hartman fucks
+½★ for Stew Deedle cameo
-1★ for fucking up the bomb package joke

First Watch: Hated it 😡
Second Watch: I'm starting to warm up to it 🤔
Third Watch: One of the best Comedies of the decade 👌 🙌 👏

Dude
If a Buff Turkey and Owen Wilson broke in and brapped on my Turkey...

I think Turkey would be off MY menu 😞

the top 30 are my favorite movies of all time
the bottom ones are close

1. Song of the Sea

   Probably my favorite movie

2. The Nightmare Before Christmas

   Also probably my favorite movie

3. Ernest & Celestine
4. Boy & the World
5. When Marnie Was There
6. Batman
7. No Country for Old Men
8. The Dark Knight
9. Castle in the Sky
10. Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind

...plus 77 more. View the full list on Letterboxd.

I tried to leave anything from 2025 off this challenge

• Neo Tokyo

  Watched 01/01/2025
  Review posted ?

• Angel's Egg

  Watched 01/02/2025
  Review posted ?

• Cat Soup

  Watched 01/03/2025
  Review posted ?

• Children of the Sea

  Watched 01/04/2025
  Review posted ?

• When the Wind Blows

  Watched 01/05/2025
  Review posted ?

• Memoir of a Snail

  Watched 01/06/2025
  Review posted ?

• Watership Down

  Watched 01/07/2025
  Review posted ?

• From Russia with Love

  Watched 01/08/2025
  Review posted ?

• Nosferatu

  Watched 01/09/2025
  Review posted ?

• Life of Brian

  Watched 01/10/2025
  Review posted ?

...plus 207 more. View the full list on Letterboxd.

Too many emojis? Perhaps...

• The Fairy King
• Song of the Sea

  My favorite movie of all time

• The Last Leprechaun
• The Last Unicorn
• The Magical Legend of the Leprechauns

me for 5 Reviews on the Week of March 17th, Saint Patrick’s Day! GLORY BE!

• Leprechaun

  Review Posted March 18th, 2025

• A Very Unlucky Leprechaun

  Review Posted March 19th, 2025

• The Last Leprechaun

  Review Posted March 20th, 2025

• The Magical Legend of the Leprechauns

  Review Posted March 21st, 2025

• The Leprechaun's Game

  Review Posted March 23rd, 2025

can't afford Netflix or Hulu BITCH!!!!???

yea me neither

• Pets
• Jack and the Cuckoo-Clock Heart
• A.C.O.R.N.S.: Operation Crackdown
• Quackerz
• Goat Story
• Goat Story With Cheese
• Prehysteria! 2
• The Hero of Color City
• Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarfs
• The Cheshire Cat

...plus 67 more. View the full list on Letterboxd.

What is this, a crossover episode?

• Dragnet
• Almost Heroes
• Old Dogs
• Earth Girls Are Easy
• The Wiggles Live At Disneyland
• Working Tra$h

1. Luca

• Dragonworld
• A Very Unlucky Leprechaun

1. Placeholder

1. Placeholder

1. Placeholder

1. Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
2. The Northman
3. Men

• A Trip to the Moon
• Your Face
• Vincent
• The Little Island
• Little Nemo: Adventures in Slumberland Pilot 3
• Joe Pera Talks You to Sleep
• The Lorax
• This Actually Happens a Lot

The ANIMALS are ANIMALS

• Over the Hedge
• The Nut Job
• The Nut Job 2: Nutty by Nature
• A.C.O.R.N.S.: Operation Crackdown

The 2000s were a mistake

• Shrek
• Shrek 2

  One of the greatest films in history.
  This one ramps the weird Neo-Medival takes on Modern Society to 11 with things like; Fast Food ts such as Friar's Fat Boy and Burger Prince, and KNIGHTS, parody of the cancelled show COPS.

• Shrek the Third

  Quality aside, there's no denying that this movie continues the aesthetic trends set by Shrek 2, with things like the Modern School with a Medieval Dark Ages coat of paint.

• Shrek Forever After
• Shrek 5

  Not out yet

• Puss in Boots
• Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

  Absolute masterpiece of the genre, though notably it tones down the pop culture references.

• Ella Enchanted

  Notable Shrekcore features include, Cariage Taxi.

• Hoodwinked!

  While this and Chicken Little are the reason I had to put brackets over the "Neo-Medival" part of the title, there is no denying this movie was inspired by Shreks cynical take on Fairy Tales.

• Chicken Little

  Disney trying (and failing) to replicate the Shrek formula.
  Notably based on a Fable and not a Fairy Tale.

...plus 8 more. View the full list on Letterboxd.

• The Nightmare Before Christmas
• How the Grinch Stole Christmas
• It's a Wonderful Life
• Meet Me in St. Louis
• The Year Without a Santa Claus
• Jack Frost
• Elf
• Mickey's Christmas Carol
• Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas
• Klaus

• The Devil and Daniel Johnston
• Dogtown and Z-Boys