James Patron

Favorite films

  • Apocalypse Now
  • Terminator 2: Judgment Day
  • The Blues Brothers
  • WALL·E

All
  • The Gorge

    ★½

  • Violet & Daisy

  • Blackjack

  • Schizopolis

    ★★½

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Florence Foster Jenkins

2016

★★ Watched

Always follow your dreams. Maybe one day Meryl Streep will portray you in a mediocre biopic.

Who Killed Captain Alex?

2010

★★★★ Rewatched

Aeons from now, in a time so distant it is unfathomable to the human form, the elder beings descend upon a council at the advent of the death of the universe. They communicate in forms beyond our comprehension to ponder one important point: They still haven't figured out who killed Captain Alex.

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The Gorge

2025

★½ Watched

Indeterminable sci-fi-horror-action streaming slop with a vaguely centrist metaphor of putting our differences aside and reaching across the aisle, yada yada. Horrifying to think that this kind of shit is quickly going to become nostalgic, it is at least still a real film made by real people even if it doesn't have much to say.

Violet & Daisy

2011

Watched

Yet another slice of young adult slop from Sersh's teenage years. Why is James Gandolfini in this lmao.

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The Help

2011

5

As we all know, rich white women were the most profoundly affected by racism in the 1960's. So we must predominately focus on the exploits of Ms. Mary Sue, a cartoonishly flawless strong independent feminist white woman who single-handedly solves racism. You're welcome, black people.

The Problem with Apu

2017

½ 7

"I certainly deserve a show."

An impotent, mewling, self-important tirade by some irrelevant comedian about a cartoon character he doesn't like, fuelled with an incredibly reductive analysis of Apu and what he is designed to reflect in American society, and endless examples from the series that are taken out of context in order to make them seem like they are the problem they are in fact making fun of.

What's really remarkable to me is how narcissistic this dude is.…