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I miss you Gigi

If you're still alive out there, I hope you're having the time of your life

EDIT: Imma fight every pleb who acts cool dismissing the film after Act 1 simply cause they miss Gosling's abs. Respect to those with critical thought, not Jersey Shore fans who thought the place beyond the pines meant the beach.

The greatest film about hot people ruining each other's lives, The Place Beyond the Pines is a seminal epic of narrative deconstruction and diversion, servicing a story about loss and the unwanted individuals left behind in the aftermath.

The champions of underappreciated art at Split Tooth Media published my essay exploring these themes, timed wildly with Beyond the Pines dropping on Netflix. Experience the film then read the Split Tooth Media piece here.

Dane DeHann.

Ex Machina if it didn't suck toxic masculinity white donkey nuts

Watched on Sunday February 16, 2025.

Watched on Saturday February 15, 2025.

Watched on Monday January 13, 2025.

Profound

Watched on Sunday February 2, 2025.

The most painful film I've ever seen.

If I could hug Kid Terry and tell him he's gonna be okay.

MY ASIAN BROTHA JON TRUEI making me feel seen out there in the white shenanigans world.

You're gonna change the world—in your way, through your lens.

*****This is a review of both THERAPY DOGS and its definitively necessary epilogue REUNION--sleekly included on the blu-ray release*****

It had always seemed like some appropriate sign that Ethan didn't need me publicly rooting for him when stupid-ass letterboxd kept not displaying my review for Therapy Dogs. There wasn't much I could contribute anyway in this crispy relatively-has-been-never-was bitter older colleague conduit carcass that types this review.

That is until I also saw what is essentially the real final 20m52 of the film, annexed as "Reunion: A Life After High School". It could not be more void of hyperbole to impress the necessity to experience it after the principal feature.

As an older unsuccessful version of Ethan, I ostensibly place my hopes and dreams in Ethan, which is why I have such misgivings with the fact that he murders himself at the end of the principal feature and has his white friends find out what happens next.

But from the first moment of this Reunion epilogue, Ethan resurrects himself, and with a grace akin to my hope for humanity, is not only at peace with his vagabond living spirit as a metafilmmaker--but gives himself the self-love to be the acknowledged driver of this entire Therapy Dogs saga that is fundamentally his. Everyone--even Justin who was displayed as the star--is one other figure in Ethan's melancholically blissful wanderer journey. Whereas Ethan was constantly at odds with his own presence and sense of belonging in the feature while everyone else is having a riot--here the tables are flipped. And this isn't in any way to say that Ethan has suddenly ego-tripped and imposed himself as the brilliant visionary lord, but rather it is the self-kindness to let himself live--from his docu-to-fiction self. All the while, his command of the line between fiction and non-fiction transcends its own peak, past the highest level of the water tower Ethan and Justin climbed. And here Ethan reaches higher than ever and lights a firework anew.

High school does end. That's the climactic reveal that always spoke for itself. But Ethan will go further than ever.

My hopes and dreams are resurrected and continue to travel with Ethan Eng.

As a Hong Kong-Chinese diaspora highly-belligerent to Asian race war politics, I had to ask schnüdlbug about the context to narratively setting his film in Hashima, given its sadistic history of Japanese war crimes which to this day its piece-of-sh1t government has yet to acknowledge. schnüdlbug’ humble answer of engagement on a architectural level while also wishing to have been more explicit with acknowledgements of the island’s horrors helped me revisit Roach without baggage. Side note: It is Repulsive, UNESCO's incompetence to rectify Japan's refusal to comply with historical acknowledgements. Like they fkn enable Japan then just go "ooh we sTrOnGlY rEgReT that they fkd up..." ls the UN just a bunch of table-talk a-hole wimps or something. Fkn eat sh1t or nuke yourselves and your “world heritage site” ignorant a$$es.

Then again, Hashima—and schnüdlbug’ extensive knowledge from design college that makes up a better part of the film’s design—is depicted according to schnüdlbug as the “polluted beyond belief [result of] horrific human atrocities” as opposed to the oft-white-fetishization of “fancy Asian” culture without any of the imperialistic/capitalist subtext (notice that Chinese out of the East Asians, let alone All Of Southeast Asia aren’t included in the whites’ perception of “fancy Asians.” And the film’s protagonist on the other hand is too caught up in the nostalgia of the unsalvageable place that is by-design home, that’d she’d rather be chased around by a giant radioactive roach then gtfo.

Starring one female visage, her A.I. friend pal (pre-WGA-SAG-AFTRA strike), and a full-screen-sized flyINGMUTANTROACH—this is the closest I’ve ever perceive digitally-animated outsider art.

This is a glitch art fever dream—the animation equivalent of creating something compelling with the limitation of your tools. A definite must-see for people who appreciate alternative digital animation, patient pacing, and minimalist-explosive payoffs.

Horrible but avant-garde level so at least there's that to appreciate. It marks the beginning of the end for superhero mask iconography, with actor's face time politics overriding the aesthetic significance of taking in the visual mythology of the characters you go into a damn superhero movie for. [Slight digression, but this anti-mask (that'd be hilarious if it somehow informed the real world) sentiment with superheroes is taken to the extreme with MCU characters who virtually never wear their masks on the posters or rip their masks off at every irrational turn during the movie, even to say words. If you wanna see those superheroes with their masks on, you'll have to stare at the merchandise lunch boxes.]

Spider-Man's in Spider-Man 3 for what feels like less than 3 minutes. And when he does make the rare bewildering appearance in his own film, 3 seconds later his mask rips off and it's TOBEY FKN MAGUIRE. The final battle Spider-Man can't even have his mask onscreen for more than 3 seconds in a row without it being half blown off and TOBEY FKN MAGUIRE staring unignorably through it.

Between the second and third act when there's literally no Spider-Man for what feels like the longest time and it just turns into a bad New York soap opera with some powers, I checked the actual length between the appearance of Spider-Man again and it was somehow 30 minutes. The longest 30 minutes of cinema I've ever sat through, not an exaggeration at all. I'm seriously not exaggerating.

It's such a fascinating disaster. And the characters just act completely moronic and nonsensical that I cannot possibly accept it as actual canon with Spider-Man and Spider-Man 2.

So whenever I do rewatch Spider-Man 3, the only way to watch it is as a bizarro borderline-Looney-Tunes fan-fiction what-if sequel ironically from the same production team, save for Danny Elfman whose void you can already half-feel by the Spider-Man 2 train scene.

Why DIY is its own art. Both gracefully raw and strikingly formalistic, like Millie dancing between the two ends.

A profoundly of-the-moment documentary masterpiece.

For the Chinatown communities—their residents, merchants, patrons, friends and family—Karen Cho's BIG FIGHT IN LITTLE CHINATOWN is an experience in collective empowerment, healing, and resilience, as well as a bridge-strengthener with the communities’ allies.

The transcendental feeling I've sought and want to give.

UPD: This film has really helped me reflect on what it means to cherish/find happiness with who & what we do have....amongst what matters most, especially these days and as we get older.

THIS is what coming of age can be. Heck, this is what Art can be for a better world. Just, wow: beautiful, comionate, deeply empathetic, absurdly fun and funny. You gotta be bone-headedly plain-ass sad-cynical-asinine to not relate or/and connect to any which one of these wholesome lovable characters and themes. Take it from a hero-nihilist—I genuinely recommend you take time to see Turning Red. The most heartfelt and exciting Asian-Canadian representation I've seen in film and simultaneously it couldn't be more universal with its heart and ways to get us caring more for one another. Bravo bravo bravo.

This review may contain spoilers.

If this being the new most-profound artwork I’ve ever experienced says anything, it’s that I welcome every step towards living my life as meaningfully and generously as possible. If the previously-most-profound End of Evangelion through all the despite-desolational-darkness is at its heart about the will to continue feeling—then 3.0+1.0 is about the will to live. The will to live your life as meaningfully and generously as possible.

Thank you, all of Evangelion.

I wish the makers of Insidious 2 could know how important this movie is to me. I could not be less void of sarcasm about that and I’ve unabashedly felt like the only living person who's responded the way I did to it.

I could go on forever about Insidious 2. The first is real good though on its own the ending is absolutely upsetting. But then the second is just a revelation. Not only does it turn both together into a 3.5-hour event, but it's hands down the greatest payoff I've ever seen. Especially when I consider horror which much of the time exists to leave things upsetting, I never thought a story could 180-degree to such earned badass hype. I don’t count Alien to Aliens cause James Cameron just went and pulled a pre-T2 on an I.P. that wasn’t his to begin with and with long distance between the iterations. I'm talking the exact same people and back to back entries. And I mean Insidious 2 is so overlooked and dismissed especially in comparison to the first, yet I understood every choice and move it makes.

First one Red Lipstick Demon is supposedly the main villain but then turns out to be a Looney Tunes cartoon bad guy, and the real villain is that freaking scary old lady and the ending to the first is so upsetting cause it's just you and Renai who knows it's Bride in Black so not only is it freaking scary but it's frustratingly lonesome in how isolated the scariness is. And then look at the poster for Insidious 2 with Renai & kids VS. Bride in Black and try not getting pumped at the wrestling match that’s being promoted. Right away it's foretelling "No More Fear, It’s Going Down".

Whereas with the first the characters are largely trapped in their fear and not understanding what’s going on, with Chapter 2 they straight up fight back and bring the pain to the demons. Cause now that the demons’ secrets are out, they’re the vulnerable ones with everything to lose—the Lamberts and company making decisive counter attacks to take back their lives from those ghost douchebags.

Thing of note is it doesn't feel weird or out of place either. Insidious 2 isn't at all a parody or undoing of the first, which is how it's so brilliant; rather it's a mega-evolution. Doesn't feel tacked on, forced, or contrived. It makes all the difference when what happens in the sequel was the plan. That's how I felt when I first saw it and I only found out later when reading up that that was the plan. So holy crud they actually pulled it off. Watch them back-to-back and story-wise it's seamless. Insidious 2 is as rewarding as an unexpected second-half-of-a-story payoff gets. Do both together and this is the best example of a first being resoundingly elevated by the second.

Watch Insidious 2 contextualized as the last half of the collective Chapters 1 & 2 so to behold how avant-garde-level hype-entertaining-thrilling it is. First one's an already-zany horror. Chapter 2 is a straight up ghost detective showdown and also rewardingly hilarious. Whereas Bride in Black is the scary mystery in the first, in Chapter 2 they go “Yo fudge that" and take on Bride + Bride’s Mom head on, investigating the crud out of them and launching the counterattack [quesadilla <33333333333].

I've been alive on this plane past a quarter-century. That was one of the greatest things I've ever witnessed. Top 13 at least.