4v291o

BALD HORRORRRR :D  i probably could’ve reviewed this before even watching it. 5 stars for the concept alone, prob like 3 for the execution. bonus points for alicia’s beautiful teeth and jerry’s beautiful hair and the beautiful bronco and the kids chanting for hotdogs n dr pepper. don’t do drugs u might go bald and start killing people!!!!!

YESSSSS HAHAHAHA DOLL WIELDING WACKO
literally puppet dead ringers. this is so lit. and a certified beanie movie 👍

people watching a poor-taste movie they knOw they’re not gonna rock with be like: “this movie is so bad🤬” lmfao

JRB with lillie langtry is me with eddie vedder

would’ve been so much better if he was actually handsome. “nauseating charm”…. i wish! 
i liked the muck tho. good muck.

one of the few movies where a remake could actually be fun and appropriate. get me in the writing room i have ideas

Watched on Wednesday May 14, 2025.

baby’s first cary movy

what i would make if i got hit over the head with a rock repeatedly then told to make a movie upon waking up

thank u george harrison

yeahhh let’s all get mad at the handsome guy and engage in looney tunes style violence towards him.  curious this is from 1989 but it doesn’t look like his convies r usa 🤔

Watched on Monday May 5, 2025.

wasted such a fun setup. the heist plot was wackkkkk. got me siding with the televangelists fr. it just so happens that the televangelist in question is tim curry with a dope southern accent. so like duh im gonna rock with him. but still. shoutout to the twin(?) elvis(?) burt reynolds(?) guys tho. and the explosions were good. although it completely lost me by the time everything was blowing up :\

did i put a scoop of pea soup in my vcr?

Watched on Thursday May 1, 2025.

u know everyone was meowing on the set

shagadelic romance medical horror!!!! yeah baby!!! the beach chase had me smiling out loud. was kinda losing my mojo towards the end but it came back😼

Watched on Friday April 25, 2025.

i mean yeah exactly of course

quite stupid👍💗 i’m like so happy for mae west she was old as hell n having so much fun😭 her shtick works so well at 80something. the jokes were funny too on god i was giggling. certainly could’ve used some major tweaks. i wasn’t rlly sold on the musical aspect until alice cooper showed up. keith moon n ringo slayed crazy hard

the style was alllllllmost there. like a toned down phantom of the paradise. everything else was pretty snoozeville. the deaths weren’t kooky enough and the jokes were so random and quite lame. tbh they could’ve done away with the cheeky funny entirely!!!! there is still a lot to like tho! but like…. this could’ve been awesome!!??!!!!!😭 the brass unicorn catapult was cool tho. the goo lady was good too. and rare instance that hearing somewhere over the rainbow didn’t make me mad

moms of the world: if ur boyfie is meeting ur kid for the first time n he’s wearing a white pimp hat,, he miiiight be a deranged sociopath

Watched on Wednesday April 16, 2025.

the adoption of 30 year old ringo starr is the very first thing that happens in this movie n a ton of the reviews say nothing funny happens until the end. girl what?😭 huge shoutouts 2 the hamlet strip tease, the pheasant hunt, the art auction, and yul brynner in drag

my socks blasted off into orbit

Watched on Saturday April 12, 2025.

juuuuust crazy enough to not matter that it doesn’t make sense but like     i kinda wish it made sense :/ loved when he was cracking tf up at the soap opera tho. crazy people spiraling is usually enough to make me like a movie

if i wasn't already wearing jeans i think i would've had to pause it n put on some 501s fr

quite awful. except for when he says “it’s a souvenir. from the crEeepY CrawLy Zoo😼”

i have a brick labeled Gene Kelly that i gnaw on when i watch this.

checks a lotttt of my boxes… colorful, handsome man, explosions, handsome man in eyeliner, unexpected bald moment, handsome man crying, a monkey,,..,,,,

beautiful, insane, weird almost naked old dude, subtle twist ending, literally what more could you want

they had that intimacy coordinator working over time jesus christ. eric roberts is so fine     duh. even tho i’ve only rlly seen the movies where he looks like a baby chick sitting in half an eggshell. i’m building up my tolerance for his crazy old man freak movies👍

can’t get much more Le Epic Nerd than this💯 long live the kurgan

i fear i’ve stamped my high speed rail ticket to gary cooper nation🤒

the overlayed convent/burlesque dream sequence was awesomeeeeee. overall very fine :)

to anyone confused: JAKE GITTES takes photos of slimy men behaving badly, ANNE GEDDES takes photos of naked babies in flower pots

Watched on Tuesday March 25, 2025.

broke my disappointment scale!!! would’ve had a chance w a pretty much entirely different cast lmfao (terri can stay). i’m sorry stanton heads but i am so tired of him popping up in every damn movie. also wouldn’t have minded if tom waits’ crooning wasn’t blasting every 10 minutes. it looked beautiful tho :) 5 stars on that front. the painted backdrops n sets r so fun! the little boy blue part slayed. the whole thing kinda felt like an actual grease sequel. i’m only being critical bc i thought this was gonna be a slam dunk😔

Watched on Monday March 24, 2025.

🏆 2/? movies where harvey keitel sits at a piano naked 
there’s a couple really really excellent lines in this. i’m gonna make a playlist of songs that go with shrimp. felt really long tho.

me with some of my savers clothes fr. pretty mid but gets extra points for the car explosion. my favorite😋

ummmm yawn!!!

teddy😭😭😭 my pigeon😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

david bowie getting really mf old really fast is so funny. lesbian vampires be damned, that boy is old!

Watched on Friday March 21, 2025.

i think the brutal mogging would hurt more than getting ur head chopped off

why do i keep watching 90s-does-70s movies like im gonna magically start liking them. also shoot me before i watch another dysfunctional family movie. fr.

Watched on Thursday March 20, 2025.

what if eric roberts looked like this in all 600+ of his movies. world peace, i think. flying cars at least. my beautiful prince aside, this was very cute! the hat man aspect was a little clunky but i’ll allow it on of… he’s literally the hat man. my idol.

i really love when crazy guys spiral. or are otherwise unwell, critically quirky, evil, delusional, or in distress. and the like.
bonus points if he’s handsome 😋

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