The best film no one’s ever seen

It punched me in the heart. Then punched me in the heart again. Then held up my life before me, and punched me in the heart. 
And bless it for that

Dear God, what a piece of shit! Badly acted, appallingly scripted, hopelessly directed and hilariously miscast. This will go down as one of the most inept films ever made BUT it is strangely watchable. Not so much for enjoyment, as the plot is ridiculously incoherent. The enjoyment comes from the early 00's detail, the audacity to think that a "film" was being created, and the curious fact that despite the stars, this never got released properly. Watching it therefore becomes something of a guilty pleasure.

P.S: The opening credits sequence is perhaps the most cack-handed ever conceived

One of my new all-time favourite noirs. Strikes the perfect balance between glamorous, lowdown, gloss and intrigue. Also contains a genuinely fascinating mystery at its heart. Loved it!